"What you are afraid to do is a clear indication of the next thing you need to do." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
F-E-A-R is probably one of the most significant emotions readers will ever face. When we're in it, it runs deep. Our minds become filled with WIF (What If I Fail) mind bombs that can derail us and send us into a tailspin tizzy...
"What if I mess up?"
"What if I can't connect to the cards, my client or my intuition again?"
"What if this happens to me or happens to me again?"
What if... What if... What if...
If you're a new Tarot reader and you're feeling the fear, thinking about jumping ship or you already have because of (fill in the blank) here are 7 tips that helped me get going again. (If you're interested in learning about what happened to me and why I feel your pain, scroll down to learn more)
1. Sit with the fear and handle it right away. Sit with it as soon as it happens and do NOT allow yourself to go down the rabbit hole. Ask yourself the following questions...
- If you felt as if you gave the best reading you could under the circumstances, what could you have done, if anything, different?
- Does this remind you of something that happened to you in the past and did this experience trigger a negative emotional response?
- Have you overcome a fearful situation in the past? If so, how did you do it?
- If you didn't overcome it, what could be the greatest take away if you did face your fears once and for all?
2. Know that this happens. First of all if you're new to the reading realm and there's bound to be some fear, so expect it. When challenges arise and you find yourself immobilized, move into the mindset of finding a solution. Contact someone who can talk you off the ledge -- preferably someone who has been down the same road before -- or contact a Tarot Behavioral coach that can offer you professional guidance. (I offer this service for a nominal fee)
3. Meditate. This helps provide an ongoing shield against fear and allows you to remain calm in the eye of the storm. During your meditation sessions, connect through your heart space and visualize joy, happiness and oneness. There is no room for fear once here. After meditating, you will be left with a measure of peace and serenity that will carry you through any challenging readings.
4. Replace the negative thoughts with positive mental role play and affirmations. Remind yourself that you ARE stronger than f-e-a-r and that it has no hold over you. Take time during your day to do some mental role playing. Visualize yourself giving clear and accurate readings. Doing this will assist your subconscious mind to accept what is impressed upon it and in time your mind and body will assume it to be true.
5. Read again to regain confidence. At this point your focus should be on rebuilding your confidence. You can do this by:
- Stopping the negative self talk. Nothing will sink your ship quicker than beating yourself up.
- Revisiting your psychic journal. Please tell me you keep one and if not, start one. If you do, revisit it so that you can review your past accomplishments.
- Get your Tarot cards out and hold them. Doing so may bring up some emotions. If so, let it out. This will not only help you re-connect with them but also help you heal any pain associated with using them.
- Call a friend and give them a reading then read for a complete stranger. The latter might push you out of your comfort zone but you're already there and this will help you push through it.
6. Don't let one 'bad' reading dictate the rest of your reading career. What I have learned as a professional reader is that there are a lot of factors going on prior to and during a reading. Some of the possibilities are:
- The person may have been seeking a certain answer and they did not like the message they received or they were disappointed that they did not receive what they were looking for. This is why I always suggest that students interview a potential client and ask them when was the last time they had a reading. If they just had 5 readings this should be a red flag.
- They may not have been open to your reading and delivery style. I am a very direct reader; however, some people may not be in the proper frame of mind to receive the message if presented that way. If you sense they might handle the information a better way, adjust your delivery style accordingly.
- You may not have gained enough rapport/trust with them prior to the reading. Don't rush into a reading if at all possible. Take a few extra minutes and offer them something to drink. Ask them if they have any questions about the reading process and if they are nervous, ask them if it would be okay to ground their energy before proceeding with the reading.
- You may have misconstrued the message or you did not give enough information around what you saw. Prior to moving on to a new question always ask if you answered their question.
- You (or they) could have been having an off day (see #7)
7. You're allowed to have 'bad' days. We're humans not robots and because of it we are bound to have a few bad days here and there. If you are feeling off, allow yourself the time to nurture and heal and when you're ready pick up where you left off.
If you are still feeling the fear, here are a few more questions you can ask yourself:
1. What do I still fear?
2. What can I do to address and reframe it with positive thoughts?
3. What action steps can I take instead of worrying about the "what ifs?"
When I first started reading I didn't have a teacher and I was not reading with the Tarot. I was basically a 'no-tools' reader and I didn't even know it. To make matters worse, because I hadn't come out of the psychic closet yet, I had ONE friend who supported my decision to read and because of that I was pretty much left to my own devices.
About 3 months into my 'donation-based' readings, I encountered a pretty tough customer. I psychically picked up that he was in an unhealthy relationship and so I told him. To summarize he told me that I was the WORST reader he had ever gone to and that I was totally WRONG. As you can imagine I was crushed and even though my reading track record was pretty accurate prior to this event, I ended up taking his words to heart and I walked away from reading altogether. It took me 3 months of beating myself up, an act of God and my friend's constant nagging to get me back in the saddle again.
Students usually ask, "Has this scenario come up for you since then?" Yes. But through the years I've learned to work through it and I have faith that with time you will too.
Still resonating with fear?
Book a session with me today and get clear on your fear. Together we'll diffuse any WIF bombs that are standing in your way.
Merry is a Tarot-based Behavioral Coach dedicated to helping clients find their passion and purpose in life. She has taught over 250 psychic development Meetup classes to beginning and advanced students.
Hi I'm Merry. I am a tarot reader, teacher and tarot based Behavioral Coach. I specializes in helping others succeed in business, relationships and in life.