How To Break Free From Invisible Puppet Masters

You meet someone new, and things seem to be going well.

You’re drawn in by their charm, their attention, and that spark you’ve been craving.

But then, something shifts.

They start saying things that make you question your worth, or they subtly undermine your confidence.

Suddenly, you find yourself in a relationship where you’re second-guessing everything and walking on eggshells.

Sound familiar? You’re not alone.

It’s a common experience for many, especially those who fall into the trap of harmful dating tactics—strategies designed to control and manipulate.

Today, we’re pulling back the curtain on these tactics so you can recognise, protect yourself, and step back into your power.

What These Tactics Look Like
Harmful dating tactics often start subtly. These behaviours can include:

• Gaslighting: This is when your partner denies things they said or did, making you question your memory or reality. For example, they may say, "You're too sensitive," or "That never happened." You start doubting your own experiences, and they gain control over how you perceive reality.
• Love Bombing: At the beginning, they shower you with excessive attention, flattery, and gifts. It feels amazing—like you’ve found 'the one.' But this tactic is used to quickly gain your trust and make you dependent on their validation. Soon after, they might withdraw that affection, leaving you confused and eager to get back to the 'high.'
• Negging: This is when they make subtle, backhanded compliments or criticisms that make you feel insecure. Comments like, "You're pretty for someone your age," or "Most guys wouldn’t like how you look without makeup," are designed to undermine your confidence.
• Isolation: They slowly distance you from your friends and family, often by making you feel guilty for spending time away from them. Suddenly, your world revolves around them, giving them even more control over your life.

Why It’s So Harmful
These tactics are not just emotionally draining; they can cause serious psychological harm.

Research has shown that emotional manipulation in relationships can lead to increased anxiety, depression, and a decline in self-worth.

Over time, you may start to believe the negative things they say about you, and it becomes a vicious cycle where their control over you grows stronger.

I’ve been there before.

I was once in a relationship where the person made me feel like I was the problem.

They used gaslighting and negging so subtly that I didn’t even realize what was happening.

It wasn’t until I stepped back and worked on my energy that I saw how I was being manipulated.

That realisation was the game-changer.

I knew I needed to take back my power and stop letting someone else dictate my worth.

How to Spot the Signs Early
So, how do you know when someone is using these tactics?

• You Feel Confused: If you often feel confused or question your own judgment after conversations with this person, it’s a red flag. Healthy relationships don’t leave you doubting your reality.
• They Make You Feel Insecure: Pay attention to how you feel after spending time with them. If you find yourself feeling unworthy, unattractive, or just ‘not good enough,’ they might be using negging or other manipulative tactics to break down your confidence.
• You’re Isolated: If you notice that you’re spending less time with friends and family and more time catering to this person’s needs or demands, it could be a sign of isolation tactics.
• Hot and Cold Behaviour: One minute they’re deeply in love with you, the next, they’re distant. This inconsistency is meant to keep you off-balance and seeking their approval.

Protecting Yourself: How to Take Back Your Power

1. Trust Your Intuition: Your gut is your greatest ally. If something feels off, it probably is. Intuition doesn’t lie; it's your inner wisdom trying to protect you.
2. Set Boundaries: Establish what you will and will not accept in a relationship. Be firm about your boundaries, and don’t let anyone guilt-trip you into crossing them.
3. Seek Support: Confide in friends or a professional who can offer an outside perspective. Often, others can spot red flags more easily when you're too close to the situation.
4. Energy Rebalancing: This is what changed the game for me. When I worked on clearing the energy blocks left by past relationships and traumas, I regained clarity and strength. My intuition became sharper, and I could see when someone was trying to manipulate me.

When to Seek Help
If you find yourself caught in a web of these harmful tactics and are unsure how to break free, this is where an intuitive intelligence consultation comes in.

​It can provide behind-the-scenes intel, guidance tailored to your situation and empower you to attract relationships that truly honour who you are.

You deserve a relationship that lifts you up, not one that tears you down. The choice is yours—take back your power today.

With love and empowerment,
Merry